And the beat goes on

Wow.  A year. Filled with change, stress, happiness, and all other eewy, gooey feelings. 

This time last year Ozzie had officially quit his job as a machinist.  I was working for an at home call center.  A was just about to start her therapy for her autism.  G was at public school.

Now both the kids are homeschooled.  A just finished a year of therapy and it is amazing how she had progressed.  G has started grade 2 in his homeschool curriculum. We own and run a used car dealership.  We have recently moved from having the business run out of the home to an actual lot and office.  

Has all this been easy?  

HELL NO!  

I have had times where both Ozzie and myself have been beyond frustrated, stressed, worried, elated, proud, and content.  We go through almost each of that every single day.  But so far, with the help of family, friends and the people who buy cars from us, the lights are still on.

Honestly, I still have moments where I wish our life was the way it was a little over a year ago.  This mostly happens when things are difficult. Did I ever aspire to have my own business? No is the simple answer.  Could I ever go back?  Again, no.  Ozzie has been happier than he has ever been.  He has been more challenged and stressed than he has ever been at the same time.  It is the proverbial double-sided coin.  You can't have one without the other.

We have not returned to church.  I still have a hard time thinking about returning without becoming upset.  I have never been very good at letting things go.  That whole situation tore into me so deeply.  I am sure it will be a while yet until I learn to let it go.  I am awful at forgiving.  Just ask anyone who knows me.  I am an eater of souls and will sooner rip your face off and tear you down than forgive.  I need to work on that.

Anywho, Spring and "The Thaw" have come to Wisconsin.  I love spring but I hate "The Thaw".  It is that time of year where the snow slowly melts, leaving everything muddy.  Slowly, you will start finding random little in your yard.  Maybe a stray Sonic cup will materialize.  "How the heck did that get here? There isn't even a Sonic within a 2-hour drive!"

But I do have a favorite thing that can only come from "The Thaw".  Maple Syrup.  Well, Maple anything.  It is tapping time.  I have often thought about trying to tap some of the trees on our land.  However I think, when would I even have the time?! Even now I should be working on the stack of receipts that have flown in and made a nest on my desk.  Otherwise, I could be straining my brain to think of new and powerful ways to market my business and get people excited to buy a car from me.

So now I am trying to find myself again.

Mother

Wife

Teacher

Small Business Owner

I am sure there is Me in there somewhere.